It's been awhile

It's wild thinking how much time has passed and how much hasn't been written. I'm sad because majority of the past three years has been amazing; but isn't it funny how we tend to hold on to the painful memories, regardless of how infrequent they may be.

Or maybe it's just me.

My favorite years of Hattie happened. She skipped the terrible twos, the threenager, and was even easier than expected to potty train. She was the most joyful toddler. I look back at photos and can't contain the smile on my face. We lived the dream!
 And we still do. It's just, as her mother, I'm not as well equipped to maneuver her determination and exuberance for life. She will fight! She will persevere! And she will make me want to throw my hands up in the air and either laugh or cry, depending on the day. Haha! She just lives life 100% intensity and it's hard to absorb it all as a parent and to channel that energy into positive outlets and actions 24/7.

Disneyland trips still happened and bi-annual visits by grandma & Grandpa Jensen we're always highlights. I spent way to much energy, time, and money on Hattie's birthday parties but I wouldn't change it. Her last big birthday was a Pirate Fairy theme, complete with my mom dressing up as Tick-Tock Crock and Chris as Hook. hahah! Chris made an awesome treasure map that lead to the pinata, even. It was the best, despite the rain.

To begin somewhere in those toddler years, lets start with me finding a job. I wanted to be able to help a bit financially so I got a job at Mission Viejo Montessori. Hattie was able to come to work with me and attend the pre-school classroom, while I was working in the infant room. I learned a lot about why I stay home. I don't want anyone else raising my children. No one else can love and feel the level of concern that you do as toward your child. I ended up leaving after one year. I just didn't see eye to eye with others who worked with me. Hattie's teacher, though, she was the best & I know she loved my Hattie Lynn. Hattie made it easy for everyone to fall in love with her.

 Interestingly, as I sit here reflecting on my time there. I'm remembering that I was newly pregnant when I started. August 2014. Three weeks after I got the job, I miscarried. I truly found it healing to snuggle all those babies and give them my love that I so badly was yearning to give that baby I had lost. & then again, two weeks before I left, July 2015, I found out I was pregnant. We went to Lake Powell that year with the Furstut Family and I miscarried again on the houseboat. I was helpless, stuck on a boat, and tried my best to keep busy hosting our cousins and playing with Hattie. Looking back my feelings manifested themselves in me being easily annoyed.
(I think I sometimes still struggle with that.)


After I returned home from Lake Powell I saw that (on Facebook) two families were searching for in-home daycare. It didn't take long for me to reach out to each of them and soon agree that I'd apply for a daycare license and have them join Hattie and I at home Monday through Friday, beginning September 2015. My only requirement was that they'd be ok with me taking their kids to Disneyland. 4 kids and I; They were the best behaved and we loved our weekly trips watching Disney Jr Live On Stage, Red Trolley Boys, Beauty and the Beast, Tangled, Frozen sing along.. and rode the carousels and heimlechs chew chew train!

Daycare was a joy. Exhausting, but so fulfilling. Parents were sometimes challenging, too. But yet again, in January 2016, we found out I was pregnant; by February I miscarried. It was the most painful one to date; and I ended up in the ER on pain medication. This time we saved the embryo and asked for it to be tested. We met with a Genetic Counselor weeks later and found out it had the same genetic translocation I do... but his was unbalanced. The silver lining of that meeting was finding out that it was a boy. A warmth to my heart, as my mother had "known" it was a boy and had "named" him Samuel long before I had even miscarried. I feel like I have so much more of a memory with this miscarriage because of knowing the gender; having a name. It's just comforting knowing so much more about this baby, rather than just always referring to "it" as a miscarriage.

With all the sudden doctor appointments, I had shaken the dependability factor of my daycare families. And then again, July 2016 we found out we were pregnant for the 4th time. This time we were blessed with a full term pregnancy. And with that, my daycare families slowly left to find care elsewhere as my belly grew larger. Not to mention I signed up to sell LuLaRoe Clothing.
 (OY! I feel like I'm such a mess on paper.. but writing it all down, I think I just needed to build my family, & couldn't, so I looked elsewhere. Just a theory though)

March 2017. We welcomed Lilah Josephine into our family and we've just loved loved loved her each and everyday; Hattie, especially.  She's now 5 months old and anxious to learn and hit the next milestone (which I don't ever track like I did with Hattie). I just really want her to be little for as long as possible cause it passes fast & who knows when our next child will join us here on earth.

Life is fun. & I'm embracing the "Come what may and Love it" attitude <3

PS. I returned all my LLR inventory this month and I'm so glad that that ship has sailed!
 

Easy like Sunday Morning

Disregard the "girl I'm leaving you tomorrow" line, and just focus on the rest of the song.

http://youtu.be/65lZt1EEW4E?t=10s

  This song popped into my head as I was downstairs washing dishes, with the smell of fresh baked cookies lingering, and listening to my daughter, Hattie, singing "Popcorn Popping" with her daddy upstairs. I sat down with glass of water to take in the moment just a little more fully, humming easy like Sunday morning; Such a calming tune. 

A minute of silence came, and then I heard whispers of, "Kitty yeow yeow". They were praying. 

She repeats the same noun over and over again until we repeat it for her in our prayers. It's the sweetest thing to hear what she comes up with.  It's mostly, "Gaah-mah", "See-een"(her cousin Selene), "Reagan", "Nina", "Home", "Kitty yeow yeow", "Mickey/Mickey house" (Disneyland), "Mommy-Daddy", Hattie-leen", "bankie", or whatever activity we did that day ..you get the idea. 

Well, Lets rewind to this morning...

  Today was another day to throw into the "difficult" pile of life. 

Okay, maybe I take that back. This morning was wonderful. We slept in til 9 and even then, Hattie allowed Chris & I to lie in bed while she played with her trains for 20 minutes until she wanted us to come join her. It was so joyful.

UNTIL (this is where the difficult comes in)

At 10am Chris left to go help some friends move (Yes, on a Sunday). Which is no big, until Hattie decided to open every item in the bathroom with a lid on it. I was right there next to her trying to do my hair, as I grabbed one thing out of her hand, she was right on to the next thing. Baby powder dusted the floor, toothpaste on the counter, face lotion smeared on her cheeks, lids thrown in the water filled sink. ... IPHONE THROWN IN THE WATER FILLED SINK! 

  I watched the whole thing happen. 

Talk. about. slow. motion. 

I just don't think I believed she'd actually do such a thing. But when she did, I stomped my feet and grunted with anger.  

(talk about a tantrum) 

It's all I could do in order to keep myself from doing something I'd regret later. 

 I sat her in the corner of our bathroom and told her not to move, as I ran downstairs and gently placed my phone in rice. 

 To my surprise, when I returned she was siting in the exact spot I left her in. Hooray Hattie! After a good 3 minutes of silence I sat with her and talked about why I was so mad and how it was NOT okay to put mommy's phone in water. (This being her second strike; The first was in the toilet!) I could tell the entire time she was anxious to give me a hug and make it "all better" as she says. And she did, three times. That was enough proof to show me she truly was sorry; or that she just hated the fact that I was upset with her. I hate it too. I actually found myself, in all my anger, still, kissing her head as I lifted her up and over into the corner of the bathroom. How ironic.

But as a mother, watching your child experiment and explore the world is a marvelous thing to see. It's shocking (in this case) to see where their curiosity takes them. 

The rest of our day was a delight, Church (without a phone = THE best), late afternoon naps, BBQ dinner, and mom's (in-law) chocolate chip cookies... with ice cream. Delightful indeed. 

Thank you Sunday for being easy.

PS. My phone is alive and well after 6 hours in a rice bath. 

BIG BEAR

This weekend we had the awesome opportunity to vacation in
 Big Bear, CA for FREE!

 Needless to say, we have awesome friends!

Here they are, Aaron & Aubrey

Here are a few photos that captured the fun we shared with friends and families. 

On our way..

Getting familiar with the neighbors :)

 

First stop of the day were the Alpine Slides.. 

I was loving the speed going down! 

Hattie and I took a gnarly fall on one of the turns and I became a human shield for my girl, note the road rash on my arm in the photo below...

In this photo we are on the top of Big Bear Mountain looking down at Big Bear Lake

BEAUTIFUL

More friends! Fiona & her Daddy Tyler  

We then went on a mile long hike, making a loop around the summit. Hattie had fun searching out birds, lizards, & other buggies along the way.

On our way back down

Aubrey, Aaron & Kaleena, Chad

Nap time was a MUST after all the fun adventuring

We then headed out for a night on the town that ended with ice cream, puppy dogs, & horses 

(unfortunately only the ice cream was captured in photos)

We went walking in hopes to find a lake view of the sunset, but we settled for this

The next morning we headed out after taking a quick stroll on this beautiful pedestrian bridge

 A BIG thank you to the Antis' for having us along :)

April Fools

Just to set it in stone I wanted to share about my wonderful abilities to fool my husband EVERY year on April fools! 

2010

Even while we were dating I  coated his toilet seat with Bengay! :) 

Unfortunately, he never noticed... He must really have buns of steel!

2011

For our first April Fools as a married couple we were on our Honeymoon in Hawaii. 

I was in the bathroom getting ready for our next big adventure when I decided the time was now. 

I called Chris over to the bathroom door and apprehensively stated that we were pregnant!

Any OBGYN would know it's IMPOSSIBLE to know you're pregnant within just DAYS.

But lucky me, I didn't marry an OB.

 HE BELIEVED ME!!

Although, I felt horrible when I saw the range of emotions on his face within minutes. 

I also got him with the classic "short sheeting"

2012

The second year, I was 8 1/2 months pregnant with Hattie. 

(can you guess where this is going...)

We were at my parents house celebrating his birthday and Easter a bit early that year. 

All day I was acting it up like my stomach was aching and questioning whether it might be contractions. I told my family I was going to go upstairs and relax for a few minutes.

Yet once I did, I set myself up for fooling them all!

I poured water on my pants, sat on the side of the tub and called for Chris. It didn't take long for, not only Chris to make it into the bathroom, but also my Mom and sisters...

and see that my "water broke"

They were so concered and wondering how in the world we were going to get me back to Orange County deliver with my Doctor. 

After only minutes I revealed it was an APRIL FOOLS prank and they all were immediately relieved, but again flustered by the range of emotions I had just caused. 

You'd think I'd learn the first time... but I just can't help it!! 

2013

I can't remember for the life of me what I did other than, again the classic "short sheet"

hopefully it comes to me soon.

2014

This year I had researched and found more fun loving pranks to pull on my husband in hopes to give his emotions a break. 

Unfortunately all of them failed when I ended up falling asleep early the night before (forgetting to set them up) and having to leave town the next morning at 5:30am to catch a train up to my parents house. I was heading there to drop off Hattie so I could join friends & go to a taping of "The Voice". 

It was a pretty fun experience with way too much standing involved! 

As we headed home it came to me.

I  called Chris and told him about our awesome time on set and how they put on a dance competition for all audience members to participate in, while we passed time before the show started. 

I, of course, being the dance queen that I am volunteered and was able to show off my moves on stage...

 the worm and all! 

The winners were chosen by the level of audience applause. 

and I WON!! 

A 45" flat screen TV!!! It was awesome!! 

But the greatest part was...

APRIL FOOLS!

I know, I know. I toyed with his feelings again. I can't help it! 

Honestly though. every great prank toys with emotions.

Check out this AWESOME April Fools Prank that 100% messes with the guys emotions

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/video-best-classroom-prank-ever-3384884

"FRIENDS are the loveliest of things”

(Written January 3 2014)

Today Hattie and I had a visitor. Her name is Zoe and she’s an old friend of ours from Aliso Viejo.  She’s a few months older than Hattie, yet Hattie still beats her in height.

Imagine that!

It’s been such a fun day. They instantly got along as they found out they’re both pooh bear fanatics! After watching Winnie the Pooh for a minute or two they began playing “kitchen”, which then turned into a tea party; complete with water.

            It made me thing just how wonderful it would be if Hattie had a sister to play with indefinitely! 

And with that said

no, we are not expecting. 

UPDATES

Since my last post...

We've actually moved!

15 mins East of where we were in Aliso Viejo. Not quite Omaha, Nebraska... but closer!

We found a town home in Lake Forest in a quaint little neighborhood complex, with what we though was the best choice for what the property had to offer and what it was priced at.

Now. In Omaha we could have gotten MUCH more bang for our buck.. but we're just not ready to leave this sunny whether and beachy coastline; Not to mention, MY side of the family ;) Although I DO love Chris' side, too!

 We had so much help moving it was awesome! I can't wait to be settled in and have them all back over to enjoy our backyard patio.

Since moving we've had my parents stay over as well as The Sweeny's. How much nicer it is to have space to entertain, rather than trying to make space to try squeezing them in! haha.

We feel so blessed, in knowing we are able to afford this home and to have been GIVEN so many big ticket items in order to fill it!

Tithing is certainly paying off ;)

Hattie is in a close 2nd with her Daddy to LOVING it the most.

She's finally got a room to call her own, a backyard to explore, and STAIRS to constantly walk up and down, up and down, while holding firmly to the bannister. She makes it all worth it.

Thoughts about Moving

Not that we've told many people, but we've been house hunting for the past two months.

Surprisingly, our first bid was accepted and we were on the road to home owners WAY sooner than I sure expected.

And I guess we're still on that road.. 

but it's become a bit bumpy with all the contingencies to remove in the process. 

(if you don't understand what that means, its OK, Im still confused about the terminology) 

It basically means we're waiting for inspections to be complete and loans to be accepted and funded by a bank... and once those are all completed then we "remove the contingencies" 

(still confused? ...Sorry)

Anyway, the point is that it's got me thinking. What if things don't work out? Or what if it's not worth it  to go through the whole process, knowing that in 4 or 5 years we'll need a bigger place. 

AND

 my biggest epiphany occurred when Chris' parents headed back home. 

Every time we visit with his family I notice that he gets 85% better about being polite, and remembering to be super kind and say sweet things. 

..Or maybe it's just that he's not so tightly wound when he's got his family near by.

And just like that, it's back to his tightly wound comfort zone within 3 days after they're gone.

SO

The epiphany 

What if we moved closer to his family?! 

-------

ugh. when I really think about it, it makes my heart ache. 

NO BEACH

 NO (MY) FAMILY

NO 360 DAYS OF SUMMER!?

But honestly, it all might be worth it to have a consistently pleasant husband 

(and more importantly, father) around. 

It IS just a thought 

but one worth talking about.